I love you so much i hate you

Oh how ironic.

I'm not the one that you want, I always let you down.
And I'm pretty sure that you've caught on.
And you can say that im just feeling sorry for myself.

If that's how you feel, then what's there to do?
I'll keep this feeling in my heart but when you look in my eyes,
you will know the truth.

Tell me how long could you hang on to a word?